Kabbalah, Ellen & White Bug

Since I’m one of those nerds who follows Astrology, This was recommended for today:

Tuesday, Venus has an aspect of brilliance to Uranus. I don’t care how busy you are, upon awakening write down your dream fragments so you don‘t forget them. Watch for inspiration from unusual places. And please make sure to follow up on it, after you copyright the idea!

 Ok then (Silly Astrologers).

I dreamed I was in a foxhole with Ellen DeGeneres. I blame this entirely on LB’s daily viewing of Finding Nemo, because I kept calling her “Dory.” All around us explosives were going off, grenades were being launched, and general mayhem was happening. We were in the desert somwhere, so I’m thinking my brian was tying to picture the War in Iraq.

I pointed to a canyon, barely visible through the sand and smoke, and told Ellen/Dory we had to go through it. She looked at me and said “You want to go in there? Are you crazy? That’s the Kabbalah Valley.”

Jigga WHAT? The “Kabbalah Valley”? Obviously my superficial knowledge of Iraqi locations made itself clear in this scene. Either that or I’m curious about Judaism. Also, another Finding Nemo reference, where Dory and Marlin are about to swim through the trench. Apparently I was playing the Marlin role, but this time Dory was trying to convince me NOT to go in the trench, which is the exact opposite of the movie.

I woke up at this point, somwhere around 4:30 am. When I fell back asleep, I started a new dream:

I was at Rooferman’s house, and there was a huge party going on. It was like a scene from those high school keg party movies, but there were kids of all ages, ranging from birth to 25. There were kids running around in sprinklers, kids sword fighting, toddlers chasing each other, babies in playpens and of course, tons of drunken teenagers and adults.

 I was trying to find LB. Maybe I was there to pick her up from visitation. I made my way through the house, where there was an orgy going on with Rooferman, Blondie and some teenage girls. I ran outside, frantic to find my child. I saw her playing with 2 other toddlers. Ironically, one of the kids was my single mom neighbor’s daughter, and the other was my High School friend’s son.

As soon as LB saw me she started running in the opposite direction. I started screaming and chasing after her. She ran into the street and for some reason I couldn’t keep up with her. Behind me, the two other toddlers started laughing and running after me, like it was a big game. I kept screaming at them to stay in the yard, but they kept chasing me. I didn’t know whether to stop and get them back on the sidewalk, or to catch my daughter.

At this point, LB was running down the middle of the road, laughing. Suddenly a car (a white Bug) turned onto the street and started heading right for LB. She kept running. I was sprinting, crying hysterically at this point, but the car swerved and went by her. The car passed me and continued up the street.

I finally got to her and was hugging and sobbing. Then I looked up the street and saw the White Bug had stopped right in front of Rooferman’s house. There was a crowd of people in the street surrounding the Bug. The driver was hysterical, and started pointing at me. Then the cops showed up.

I never actually saw what happened, but it was obvious that the driver had hit either one or both of the other two kids. People were crying. Rooferman and Blondie showed up, half naked. The driver was trying to blame me for the kids running in the street. I was begging the cop to listen to me.

Finally the cop told everyone to calm down, and he told me it was going to be alright. Very odd, because most of the time, Cops are bad guys in my dreams. He handcuffed Blondie and Rooferman and the two teenagers they were in bed with, and took them to jail. The driver went home. I stayed frozen, sobbing with relief.

Then I woke up.

What the hell? Kabbalah? A White Bug? Ellen DeGeneres? A Good Cop? What do you think?