court, custody, deadbeat dad, single mom


Last day of work. I’m using a nice chunk of Annual Leave so I can take 2 weeks off and spend much needed time doing nothing. I’m so lucky to have such amazing people in my life. Today, no less than 5 different co-workers brought gifts for LB and me.

I was even presented with an entire frozen turkey.

Rooferman left several messages on my phone mentioning something about “leaving town with his daughter during scheduled visitation days.” I promptly sent him a certified letter indicating that unfortunately he did not show up for mediation today and therefore was not present to discuss this issue. And since he recused the judge, we have to start from scratch again with our parenting plan. Currently there is no order stating what our parenting time is, and therefore I have every right to take our daughter for Christmas. Since he had her for Thanksgiving, I think this is a reasonable and fair that I should have her for the next holiday. I informed him that we will be back in time for a Christmas celebration with HIS side of the family where he is welcome to participate and spend the night with LB at his parents’ house.

I’m sure Blondie will open his mail and read the letter first. I’m sure she will have a lot to say about it, and eventually I will hear from Rooferman speaking in her voice. I’m thinking of shutting my phone off for the entire week.

I’m also thinking of spending my egg donation compensation on officially hiring Lawyerdude. I don’t know how much further my legal expertise will reach. I’m exhausted. I don’t know if I can stand another 2 months of this should-I-or-shoudn’t-I-what-stunt-is-he-going-pull-next insanity.


20 thoughts on “Limbo”

  1. I can’t even imagine how draining this is so you do need two weeks to do nothing but enjoy LB.

    Blondie will get over it, she has her own kids she SHOULD be worrying about. (notice I said should)

    I love when the kidness of others just comes at the right time, it is such a good boost to help getting away from that feeling of things always being just so limited (if that made any sense). I always take things like that as a sign that it will get better from here, one little gesture at a time.


  2. Enjoy your time off…you’ve earned it! And if lawyerdude can make sure you get a good custody arrangement fast, then I’d say he’s worth every penny…good luck!


  3. Here’s wishing you a relaxing and restful holiday. This is the time to nurture yourself and LB. You’ve done everything a reasonable mother can do in dealing with unreasonable people. Shut off the phone with a joyful heart.

    Lots of love to you, sister! Happy holidays 🙂


  4. Yeah, if any deserves having four Christmas-es, it’s you! Have fun in AZ! FYI, if Rooferman/Blondie do leave nasty messages, I’d save them as proof that you do need Mediation for the courts.


  5. Ugh, I wish I was even remotely closer to your side of the state so I could help you. 😦 I agree. Turn the phone off and take a vacation from his drama.


  6. You did the right thing! He knew the rules, he broke them and he must suffer the consequences – but I do think you are being totally fair though!

    ENJOY the time off! Getting a lawyer isnt a bad idea – had I had to deal with my crazy ex I would have been taking away in a straight jacket years ago!


  7. Yay for you! What oyu are doing seems fair and reasonable, and he is at some point going to have to deal with consequences of his poor choices; this is just the beginning of that. I also agree with whomever mentioned saving his messages; that could very well sink him. and if you CAN afford to hire Lawyerdude, I would say go for it.


  8. Stay strong angel….I went through 14 months of similar ‘should-I-or-shoudn’t-I-what-stunt-is-he-going-pull-next insanity.’ and WON! I know that you CAN DO IT! We’re behind you 100% of the way! 🙂

    Take some time, enjoy your holiday…and cut yourself some slack!


  9. You just really amaze me…each time I read your blog I realize thta this is such a draining time in your life, I am so glad that the folks at work were so kind, what a great bonus and miracle, eh?

    Rooferman needs to understand that there are consequences to actions or lack thereof and Blondie needs to back off until she’s invited. LOL!

    Nonetheless, I hope you turn your phone off for a few days, relax and enjoy your time together.



  10. Stay strong baby, but I do think the lawyer idea is a GREAT one. You could, methinks, discontinue contact with him 100% and have all communication go through the lawyer. It may relieve some stress.

    Merry Christmas! *hugs*


  11. I want to thank you for visiting my blog because it led me to yours, and you truly have a gift for writing.

    My heart goes out to you, and I hope and pray that you find peace this holiday. Yes, turn off the phone, relax and recharge.


  12. That is fair. We did the same thing. Since I had J for Thanksgiving I let him see him for Christmas.

    They got this whole ball rolling. They can’t have it both ways.


  13. This is my first time here and from reading what you are going through, I see a differnt version of the anguish I am living through. Know that you are not alone as you struggle to get what is right and just and fair.


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