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Suspicions Confirmed

December 12, 2008

At about 7:15 last night, I thought my Rooferman theories were about to be disproved. I hadn’t received a phone call, offering to drive LB home, so I headed on over to Blondie’s house as usual.

No truck in the driveway. No lights on in the house. There was a maroon Suburban sitting outside, but I’ve never seen it before. I knocked on the door, thinking maybe Rooferman’s truck was in the shop or something. Yeah right. No one answered.

Called Rooferman twice. Finally he picked up.

“Where are you?” I demanded.

“What time is it?”

“7:35 you moron.”

“No way! Sorry I didn’t realize it was so late!”


“Uh, out by your area.”

“Well I’ll be home in 15 minutes. Be there.”

I hung up and sped through the construction zone. Rooferman’s diesel truck was sitting outside my apartment complex. He passed LB off to me and apologized again.

“So what’s going on?” I said. “Do you even live there anymore?”

He looked shocked, like he couldn’t believe I had figured it out.

“Well, I don’t live there right now….but I will soon.

WTF?? WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN? I asked him where he was living then, and he said with “a buddy.”

I told him he needs to let me know where he’s taking our daughter on visitation. I also told him Mr. Mediator only had limited amount of time next week and if he didn’t call tomorrow we would NOT get in to see him. I told him it was his responsibility to call, not mine.

Once inside, LB immediately drank 2 glasses of water and asked for some bread. She also was wearing a diaper. She said her foot hurt because “daddy got her in the street” whatever that means. Its so hard doing this with a 2-year-old who can’t really express everything clearly. I’m lucky my daughter talks as well as she does.

I wish this mystery had been solved, but now I have even more questions. Questions that will probably never be answered.

All I can do is document everything and bring it to mediation, where I will ask every question with a 3rd party present. If he bails on that, I will notarize my documentation and bring it to court.

I’m not letting this get to me. The Polar Express is tomorrow and its going to be totally fun. On a side note: My mom wants this for Christmas. Do you think its a scam? Because it would be the perfect hilarious gift.

22 Comments leave one →
  1. December 12, 2008 10:47 am

    This is looking better and better for your case. Which really is about what’s in the best interest of LB. Ugh.

    Google the game a bit and see if you can find reference of it anywhere else.


  2. laurakim123 permalink
    December 12, 2008 11:23 am

    He is just digging a very big hole for himself!!!

    What is the Polar Express? It sounds like something fun!!


  3. December 12, 2008 11:23 am

    That would make me angry. But like April said, he’s just making himself look bad.

    The Polar Express sounds fun. We don’t have anything like that around here.


  4. QTMama permalink
    December 12, 2008 11:28 am

    It does make me wonder if Blondie would have been nicer to you now, if she had been around to answer the door.

    And yes, Rooferman isn’t looking so well, at all. I hope things work out the way you want them to, sweets.


  5. December 12, 2008 11:50 am

    Is it bad that I’m starting to feel sorry for Rooferman? Prbly my codependency talking, but, I mean, wow. He’s a hot mess of issues that need large tissues.

    That game looks like they are in Ohio. If they take your money and don’t give you a game, I’ll personally drive there and kick their arses.

    I SO get you on the two year old that can’t express herself. (In my case, himself) Son is a very good talker too, which adds insult to injury when people say kids bite b/c they can’t communicate well. My kid can hold a 10 minute conversation with you… but he’ll bite your arm right off. What do I do about THAT? Anyway, it’s frustrating not to know what’s going on in their little brains. Do you think that maybe LB ran into the street or something and Rooferman yanked her back and possibly hurt her foot in the process?


  6. December 12, 2008 11:59 am

    So glad you’re documenting everything – Looking better all the time.


  7. December 12, 2008 12:16 pm

    SWM- Sometimes I think that’s why I got involved with him. The whole “Oh he’s just so misunderstood and has so much potential” philosophy was really running through my mind during our entire relationship. Who knows how long I would have stayed with him, hoping for his day of reckoning.


  8. December 12, 2008 1:05 pm

    You called it. Well, I guess she won’t be whispering in his ear at court this way. I’m really sorry about all the drama though, that really sucks. I’m excited about the Polar Express too, it should lots of fun. Love ya!


  9. carrielt permalink
    December 12, 2008 1:39 pm

    I bet LB will love the Polar Express. After my parents divorced my mom never talked bad to me about my dad. But you know what she didn’t have too. He shot himself in the foot many times and I figured out what type of person he really is. Even at age 2 1/2 LB knows.


  10. December 12, 2008 2:24 pm

    Wow sounds like a lot is being revealed indeed. I hope that all goes well with the mediator and just take it a step at a time, given enough rope some end up making gorgeous knots and others end up hanging themselves.

    Take care!


  11. December 12, 2008 6:28 pm

    You know this might count as a change of circumstances that could get his visitations revoked. He needs to have a safe place to take her to during his visits… I wold definitely look into it.

    I know that when my ex and I first split even our very first custody order stated that he must have an appropriate place to bring the girls for his visits.

    Have fun on the Polar Express! We have it here too, but it’s pricey and I haven’t been able to swing it yet.


  12. December 12, 2008 6:45 pm

    Ugh. This sucks. Huggles and stuff.

    We’re holding off on the Polar Express until next year… it’s about a 2 1/2 hour drive. I can’t frigging wait, though. I’d love to go.


  13. lilcyndiluwho permalink
    December 12, 2008 7:11 pm

    My X’s mommy is going back home to Croatia for a month. Maybe Rooferman can shack up there for a little while and they can all eat bread and KFC 3x a day together!! Good times.

    UGH…. just stand him under a sturdy beam or tree branch and keep giving him that rope.


  14. December 12, 2008 9:10 pm

    whoa! that is so wow — and what did he think, you wouldn’t figure it out?

    I hope you guys have a fantastic time at the PE (it is overdue and well deserved)


  15. December 12, 2008 9:59 pm

    Oh man, that is scary. But I’m glad you know and you found out before your next court date.

    Have fun at the Polar Express.


  16. December 12, 2008 10:41 pm

    Ugh. Just makes me sick. My ex has pulled some shady weird stuff like this, drives me nuts. I don’t understand why Rooferman wouldn’t just tell you he wasn’t living there right now. Well actually I do, its because it makes him look bad. I hope you and LB have a great time tomorrow on the Polar Express! You both deserve it!!!


  17. Shiona permalink
    December 12, 2008 11:53 pm

    Oh wow! Apparently he has gone to new lows. Hopefully going to the Polar Express wil make up for the bad visitation. He definitely has to help himself.

    That game looks pretty cool. Hopefully it’s not a scam.


  18. December 13, 2008 3:55 pm

    Huge hugs, Hanna. Good thing that you seem to have quite a few IQ points on Rooferman. He does appear to be digging a lovely hole for himself. I am as always just floored by your courage and strength. It is so scary when they are too little to really tell us what is going on. Keep the faith, sister.


  19. December 13, 2008 7:26 pm

    You’re doing the right thing sweetie. Document everything. Ask for answers in PUBLIC. It will work out.

    Are you seeing the Polar Express movie? It’s wondrous. The perfect holiday movie.


  20. December 14, 2008 8:00 am

    Document, baby, document baby.

    I just had my suspicions confirmed that my ex is in jail, but not yet that he is no longer living with his sister. His family’s keeping their lips tight.

    It’s so hard to let her go isn’t it.

    Just be glad she can talk and keep track of everything so that if things get bad you have some kind of proof!

    Peace and Hugs!


  21. Marta permalink
    December 15, 2008 9:10 am

    Hey sweets, it’s Marta, I beleive this is my first time posting on your blog but I have been reading for a few weeks now!
    Anyway, all I can really say is that I agree with everyone else, he is really digging a hole for himself. So just keep documenting everything and anything that happens and soon enough things will turn around for u. HUGS!


  22. December 16, 2008 11:51 pm

    I just wanted to say that I can’t even imagine being in the situation you are in. Aside from the legal battle.. just the uncertainty of not being thoroughly sure of where your child is all the time! I would just be completely unable to function if I were in your position, and I truly hope things take a turn for the better soon where LB and her dad are concerned. What a strong woman you are, and what an excellent example you’re setting to raise a strong independent woman. Love your blog.


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