colorado, dating, depressed, single mom

Dating disaster

I wrote a long, bitter post about Singles Meet and Greet, but I just felt even most pissed off after completing it, so I figured if I can’t even make myself feel better after purging the feelings, why publish pointless negativity?

Honestly it wasn’t that bad. There weren’t any stalkers there. The food was good and the bartenders were nice enough to give me the leftover Martini shaker along with my Cosmopolitan. Everyone else was drinking Bud. Everyone else was also at least 40 years old.  JL and I were the only  20-somethings in the room.

Ok I take it back, there was a 22-year-old mechanic who was pretty toasted. When the MC announced we were going to Speed Date, I was ready to join him. Three Cosmos and one glass of wine later, I had actually  met about 10 single dads, all about 42ish and all with kids over the age of 13. They were nice guys. They cared about their kids. They were almost as old as my parents.

Am I agist? Maybe. All I know is if MY dad were dating a 26-year-old, I would puke on his Birkenstocks.

The worst moment: When I was paired up with the only 50-something guy, he actually looked at me and said “What is someone like you doing here? I’m 30 years older than you!” Well, uh, I they didn’t tell me I’d have to qualify for Social Security in order to show up tonight!  Poor guy, he was so embarrassed to be sitting in front of me. I was humiliated.

The best moment: One 40-something single dad patted me on the back and said “I know its hard being a single parent, but don’t worry, you’ll be ok.” Most of the other guys had a sense of humor, and I was buzzed enough to laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation.

When it was all over, I literally ran for the door. JL made out better than I did. She at least won a gift certificate. I went home, put my daughter to bed and devoured a box of bagel bites drowned in hot sauce. The power went off some time in the middle of the night and I woke up with the sun pouring through my window. Dropped off LB at daycare and made it to work an hour late.

 I feel sad today. I think about what other 26-year-olds are doing right now. Working their lucrative careers all day? Partying with other successfull, childless Durango VIPs all night? They obviously aren’t going to “Singles Meet and Greet”, that’s for sure.  I wonder if I will end up as one of those 40-year-olds, moving down the line, desperately hoping to find someone before my hair falls out.

P.S. The “Parenting Class” wasn’t what I thought it would be. It was a therapy session where the counselor asked me how I felt about the situation with Rooferman and LB. So basically I broke down and cried like a baby for an hour and a half. I did get some advice on all natural hippie stress relief remedies, so it wasn’t an entire loss, but for the most part, yesterday was just one long, depressing experience.

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15 thoughts on “Dating disaster”

  1. Well thanks for the boost. I am 36, my dear, just another one of those pathetic old people who can’t get a date. Granted, I have breasts, but still. I might as well fall over and die right now, because there is simply no hope for me. In a nutshell, you have pinpointed one of the main reasons I don’t date, don’t and won’t go to singles things, won’t do the online thing (well that and the fact that nobody is asking me out): I am too old, and too tired.

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  2. Yeah, singles thing a very odd experience. But at least we went. Besides, now we can go have lunch with the gift certificate. I know you will also find Mr. Right when the time is right, neither one of us will end up alone. Love your girlie and it was awesome going out and hanging out even if it was sort of a bust. See ya soon!!

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  3. I’ll be 28 this month, so I’m a couple years closer to 40 than you are… Sorry your day was so depressing. You’ll probably find someone when you’re least expecting it.

    And I know how you feel when it comes to thinking about what other people our age are doing. Last weekend, Shiloh and I didn’t see another person all day Saturday. It looks like this Saturday will be the same. Sometimes I dread the weekend as much as I look forward to them. Oh well.

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  4. I know it was a sucky day…and it’s not funny…but the way you write about it makes me laugh. I’m sorry to laugh though!

    I just picture you with these older guys and just wanting to meet a fun, 20-something and sitting across from someone your dad’s age. Not funny, I know.

    Because I’m afraid to post about it on my blog…I’m going to see a single dad ‘friend’ this weekend who I ‘used’ to have a huge crush on. But his son is older (so is he) and here I am still schlepping diapers and wipes around in my sassy Target purse. It’ll be interesting…

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  5. I am sorry to hear you had such a bad day sweetie! It will all end up just fine. The child support will work out, and you will find someone… I know it! You still stand strong for LB, and as JL said before you know it you will be sharing your time with a very special guy, who better treat you right! Just know that I love you and miss you!! Tell LB hi!! Sending lots of love from Connecticut!!! 🙂

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  6. Sorry to hear it wasnt so nice!

    I kinda like older men ;-p But I do get what you saying.

    Like JL said – at least you went. Now you know!

    And its actually nice just meeting people cos you never know who they know – so embrace these opportunities 😉

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  7. LOL – I just posted about my decision NOT to date anymore!

    Yesterday may have been hard, but I am glad that you got the chance to break down. Sometimes we need that.

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  8. Oh honey….what a hard and disappointing day! I know what you mean about the age thing. I too have very young parents and just could never bring myself to date anyone close to that age bracket (and I got hit on a lot by them…sigh). It WILL turn around sweets….it WILL

    Today is a brand new day…take it for what it is and move forward…Mwaaaaaaaaaaaa…BIG HUGS

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  9. I’m sorry, here’s a HUG!!!!

    I’ll be 34 on Wednesday and I also don’t feel like I belong anywhere. I feel like my inner clock is saying that’s it, no more babies for you, this is it, this is your life, just you and your little boy. OK I’m feeling a little sorry for myself this week, sorry about that.

    I think at my age I’d like to meet some of those guys, pass one or two my way.

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  10. Aw man! I’m sorry the weekend didn’t go better for you. One twentysomething. That’s crazy! Here’s a big hug after the fact and I hope you find someone worthwhile where you least expect it.

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  11. Aww, don’t give up! If things aren’t looking up after a while, why don’t you try online dating? Unless you already are. Trying to Start Love can be fun through online. But you should be able to trust your gut feeling and if it feels like someone isn’t being very truthful, you should probably trust that feeling. But your night sounds funny, and horrific at the same time.

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